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I have a different opinion on this question. Many people will choose the first one to make you better, but I will tell you from personal experience that making you better depends on whether it is good in the eyes of others or what you want to be. This direction for the better is very important. . There is also a way to make you better, which is something you can’t bear. I knew that there was a problem before, that a pregnant woman forced her husband to read the comics designated by her husband every day and learn all kinds of things. Anyway, the arrangement was full from morning to night. At that time, I knew that er was spraying her on one side. Husband. Speaking of myself, I did meet a big boss before, and people really asked me to become better. The reason is that in how many years he will definitely climb high and become a leader, so I have to earn at least one month. Tens of thousands, and then forced me to study four hours of English after get off work every day. I gave me red envelopes after I finished studying. Someone must say wow, great, and I still have money to learn. Yes, yes, I went up to my English level in one month, and then there were more than 300 people in our class, and I got the first place in my direct study time. People asked me to learn English because they wanted me to go abroad. There are black people everywhere in the poor country. In addition, I have to read political knowledge every day, which is the kind of national events at home and abroad. This is nothing. I was also forced to learn football knowledge, saying that I want to cultivate a common hobby. I am from Chaoshan, Mandarin II. B, people from the north, and even I want me to learn Mandarin. I was disliked and got up early. I wanted to make a top one because I wanted to deal with other bigwigs. I used to be like this with hundreds of millions of people. ←_←Is this the difference between the rich and the middle class? Many of the rich are T-shirts and slippers when going out. In addition, it must be suppressed every day. What kind of rubbish what you wrote? Look at what you wear (I wore black Martin boots), and you are behind now, if you don’t work hard, you can only go back to the countryside…what You are beautiful now, but people will get old, so you don’t want to study hard… You say you have an IQ of 130, I think you are a pig… Anyway, there are a lot of this kind of people being criticized every day. If it’s blacked out, it feels like I don’t have any autonomy, which is similar to the transformation project of the ideal object. Later, people approached me several times and said that they could ask him for help. It is probably a bit skeptical. I think he is such a man of high social value, why I have a hole in my mind to hide away. When I can make myself better by myself, I don’t need to live like this kind of “problem children’s concentration camp”… We can never put the hope of becoming better on others, but I will become better by myself. Then others will come. So I think it’s not bad to get a piece of it, if we can play it, it’s even better.

zhiwo

By zhiwo

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helpmekim
6 months ago

In fact, what is really needed is neither a person who strives to make you better, nor a person to accompany you to play, but a person who can accompany you to become better. This person can accompany me to grow up and share the happiness, sweat and sadness along the way. (Partner?) Rather than needing someone who can only urge me to help me condescendingly. (Parent?) There is no need for someone who pesters me or expects me to play with him every day. (Children?) After all, each of us has a strong heart, self-esteem, and wants to relax, and even let ourselves go occasionally. So what we need is trust, understanding, companionship, support, assistance… and even, no interference! For me, whether it is a person who works hard to make me better, or a person who always wants to play with me, in a sense, it may be a kind of interference and pressure. But it is too difficult to find someone who can accompany you to become better! How luxurious is it that two people can work hard, study together, grow together, encourage and support each other, and share their leisure time after work together? ! So it’s better to go forward alone, whether it’s wind or rain, take it alone and enjoy it alone

heloword
6 months ago

Choose the one who makes you happy! The so-called “people who work hard to make you good” are too shit, most of the time he just passes his anxiety to you irresponsibly. You have to believe that people who can make you happy can generally accompany you to make progress and struggle together, and they will also find fun with you in this process, and live happily through difficult times. Such a person is the priceless treasure in your life!

helpyme
6 months ago

Now that I have asked, I already have an answer in my psychology. It is more necessary for me to become better. Of course, I hope that people who can improve themselves. Playing with you is a short appointment. This feeling is possible if you are young. There is more demand, but when you are in contact with society, the need for this may not be very obvious. Let yourself become better gradually, this will benefit your whole life, and the heart will follow this idea. Today’s society is demanding more and more for everyone, and we spend more and more. Indebtedness has become the norm. There are more or less borrowings on various platforms. The cost of living is huge, and the salary is meager. It’s true. It is difficult to cope with daily expenses. Because of these various reasons, it is very obvious that it makes me happy or makes me better. Persist in making yourself better, cheer on strangers

sina156
6 months ago

I will choose the other person who will work hard to get better by myself and infect me to get better, not forcing me to change. And this person we will have fun with each other, not always he comes to relieve me of sorrow. That is, these two people can be implemented on one person, and everyone can unify these two points. If you find that everyone has only one point, it means that you are divided. You will not integrate the two aspects into yourself. When you are self-motivated and can find interesting things to relax and decompress, you will find that either of these two people can be good, but if you are separated It’s hard to manage this relationship well, even if you choose one now, you should cultivate yourself and improve yourself. So my answer is that you can choose any one. Everyone is unique and you will have a different life experience. The most important thing is how to manage after choosing. Discover a person’s superior system and see his complete and perfect side. Only this kind of relationship can last.

yahoo898
6 months ago

There is no standard answer to this question. Even for the same person, the choices under different experiences, ages, and moods are different. My real experience: When I was in high school, I lived in a very stressful environment. People around me refused to communicate non-essentially in order to compete. I asked others questions, and others didn’t talk about it because they wasted their time. My environment is impersonal. In my life, there are teachers who urge me to work hard, use their indifference and dedicated hard work to remind my motivated classmates, there are endless examination papers, and there are accurate rankings for each subject. There are day-to-day pressures, the spur of the teacher’s family that is almost oppressive… And as a person with multiple needs, I was also extremely deficient in joy, relaxation, and fun at that time. I am a good boy, I know how to work hard, and I have always been very practical, but I hate the hell life where there is only academic competition. So, let me be the candidate at that time, I will choose to accompany me to play together, even if it does not conform to the mainstream values ​​in the high school environment, but he makes me feel relaxed, real, simple, and pure. Only by staying with him can you slowly loosen the tight heartstring. However, if it is now, the university is a place where it is completely conscious to win, the number of courses will not be full, and the degree to which you can learn depends mainly on yourself. Therefore, what I lack is a comrade-in-arms who study together, make progress, and supervise each other. Therefore, the situation of others cannot be used as a reference. You have to ask what time it is and what your perception tells you is more important, follow your heart. Because only you know what you really want.

leexin
6 months ago

Most of the population will choose the former, but actually prefer the latter. Human nature is still an emotional creature. Who can bring a relaxed, happy mood, who will be more popular. Although parents and teachers carry out education under the banner of “good for you”, they are inexplicably repelled by the children. One of the most criticized “straight men” is that they like to tell girls how to do better. There is no doubt that there are people among them who really help you to ascend. However, a serious atmosphere of communication can make people feel an urge to escape. On the contrary, people who can bring a relaxed and happy atmosphere will be more likely to be loved by people. As a result, some “bad guys” who hang bells and do not do their jobs will be more popular than sincere “good guys.” Some people think that this is because the “bad guys” have a higher appearance, so they can provide better emotions. This is right, because self-confidence does make people more relaxed. But this is not accurate, and there are many examples of people who have good looks but don’t know how to communicate. Moreover, emotions are sometimes a kind of “filter”, and people who are too serious look staid and not beautiful. Fortunately, “being good together” and “being happy together” are not contradictory. Do the following points, you can effectively improve your personality charm: 1. Learn to keep a good mood “out of thin air”. The existence of “mirror neurons” in the brain causes emotions to be transmitted to people around them. Just keeping yourself relaxed and happy is enough to make others feel the same way. It makes sense to be aware of the current emotions and maintain a good mood. 2. Specify the problem rather than interfere with the choice. When you see that the other person is “stupid”, you can point out the problem, but don’t take the initiative to tell them how to “correct.” If they ask, you still have time to answer. Of course, if the other party has no intention to correct, there is no need to struggle. 3. Provide emotional value. When the other party is doing well, you can compliment it in time. As in the “Pavlov’s Dog” experiment, human behavior will also be reinforced by positive feedback. Give each other a bit of “sweetness” every time they meet, and they naturally prefer to get along with you. 4. Provide possibilities instead of closing possibilities. When you have to tell the other person how to do it, you can replace “how it should be done” with “how it can be done.” “Should” means that there will be trouble if you don’t do this, and it contains a strong sense of anxiety. “Yes” is much better. Doing these points well can help you maintain a relaxed and pleasant communication atmosphere and effectively improve your charm in interpersonal communication. All in all, emotions are an important factor affecting people’s preferences and behaviors. There is actually no inevitable contradiction between helping others and being likable. The key is to bring good emotions to the other party. If your goal is to be a good teacher and helpful friend, you are welcome and can help others, this issue is worthy of your attention.

greatword
6 months ago

One is Zhihu and the other is Douyin. But I didn’t say which one makes you better, which one is to accompany you to play with you. I just feel that some people’s opinions are slapped in the face. I also said that if you want to choose, choose to accompany you to play with you. In fact, a person who works hard to make you better can also play with you. A person who accompanies you to play with you may also become better with you. As for what is good, this is your own definition.

loveyou
6 months ago

Now that I have asked, I already have an answer in my psychology. It is more necessary for me to become better. Of course, I hope that people who can improve themselves. Playing with you is a short appointment. This feeling is possible if you are young. There is more demand, but when you are in contact with society, the need for this may not be very obvious. Let yourself become better gradually, this will benefit your whole life, and the heart will follow this idea. Today’s society is demanding more and more for everyone, and we spend more and more. Indebtedness has become the norm. There are more or less borrowings on various platforms. The cost of living is huge, and the salary is meager. It’s true. It is difficult to cope with daily expenses. Because of these various reasons, it is very obvious whether to make me happy or to make me better. I definitely choose the former. There are countless people playing with you, and very few people help you grow up. Take money as an example. How many are willing to spend money with you, but how many are willing to help you make money? So I definitely choose the former, and this kind of person needs to be cherished. In fact, everyone can play, but some people know that he still has his unfinished responsibilities. Those who accompany us to play with us are really happy at first, but after a long time, they will feel that they are missing something. A person who strives to make us good, although it is out of sincerity and trust, we will gradually get tired. Only mutual achievement, mutual support for each other’s growth, efforts to become better, mutual accomplishment, accumulation of more common experiences, and trust. Such a relationship is both comfortable and long-lasting.

strongman
6 months ago

Can’t you have it at the same time? Contradictory? If you have to choose, you must choose someone who works hard to make you better. How much such a person likes to admire you, accompany you more and more powerful, confident and excellent, no matter how difficult the test, always accompany, it is commendable. However, there are many people who accompany and accompany the entertainment. On the surface, the scene is lively, but when facing the setbacks and difficulties, the people who accompany the entertainment are almost disappeared. There are only people around who are working hard to make you better. It’s worth cherishing to have charcoal in the snow.

stockin
6 months ago

In fact, the last thing you want to choose is the person to play with you when you want to play, and the person to make you better when you want to become better. If the other party cannot satisfy you, you will consider substituting. After you change, you will find that the person who makes you good will often put you under pressure, will be demanding of you, and will be boring, because his life is a variety of indicators of boring. The person who plays with you is certainly very interesting, interesting, and makes you very happy, but he is not motivated and incapable, and surrounds you all day long, and you are too annoying and incompetent. So you go around and get older, and fewer and fewer people can satisfy you. Due to time pressure, I chose one. It’s not because I like it or I am satisfied, it’s just a difference. Don’t laugh, what I am talking about is most love and marriage.

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