Maybe everyone will have this experience. Some people make a very excessive joke, and when you feel offended, the other person throws a lighthearted sentence: “Don’t mind, why stingy, I didn’t mean it, it’s all friends. Why is there such a big fire?” This kind of joke’s response to the angry reaction of the joker is somewhat more annoying than the joke itself. In addition, jokes about appearance, personal preferences, personal life, parents and family, etc. often make people feel offended. Typical examples are “big butt, good health”, “you are so fat and still eat”, “this dress is not for you”. A joke, it can be said to be a spice in a boring life. However, not everyone likes these jokes, and some casual jokes are really hurtful. The joke you made is a joke that hurts me. It is a special language phenomenon. It’s hard to say whether jokes are polite or impolite, it’s more between polite and impolite. In other words, it is not easy to make a joke. A proper joke can leave a good impression of humor. But if the joke is overdone, it may feel offensive. For the person being teased, the jokes you make sound more like teasing and insults to them. At this time, the jokes are really not funny. So, what kind of jokes would make people mind? After reading the relevant Weibo and comments, Shu Duan compiled a list of “Top 20 Most Mind Jokes”, and found that many of them were ridicules about body and appearance, and some of the jokes were very targeted. female. But compared with these, on the premise that the joking offends the other person, the joke’s response to the angry reaction of the joker is somewhat more annoying than the joke itself. “Don’t mind, what’s stingy? I didn’t mean it. Why are friends making such a big fire?” “You really can’t make a joke” “I’m angry like this? Let me count it wrong, you won’t be so. Glass heart?” I believe everyone is familiar with these three sentences. Obviously he was the subject of jokes, but in the end he was disliked “Stingy”, “Can’t play jokes” and “Glass Heart”. Anyone who listened to it would be even more angry. Originally making a joke may be out of the atmosphere of relaxation, and the response after the joke is messed up may be a step down for myself, but I didn’t expect that to say that would make people feel more responsive. The joke itself has a certain dispelling meaning, it is like a “gold medal for avoiding death.” If you show a slight remark, feel offended, and show an unhappy look, the other party responds with “I’m just kidding”, On the contrary, it makes people reflect on whether they are too serious and can’t play a joke. But it’s really not that we are too sensitive. In addition to this kind of “suffocating” response that makes people mind, there are many jokes that are not very polite in themselves. “A big butt is good for childbirth”, “You can give birth to a boy at a glance”, “If you haven’t read a book, you would have been a mother”, this kind of ridicule about female fertility is inherently sexist. “I would like to use my three years in prison to change the shadow of her life”, “Starting in three years, the death penalty is not lost”, “If you like it, you can get medicine if you can’t catch it”. Such remarks are far beyond the scope of jokes and can be said to be sexual harassment. Although some jokes are not so serious, the “pointing and fingering” revealed in the words are also out of date, such as “Your clothes are not suitable for you, this shoe is not suitable for you, this bag is not suitable for you” “My God, what are you doing? I would like him, no eyesight” Wait. These jokes, do not easily say “all jokes are three-point truth.” This sentence is not unreasonable. The jokes are not mere words, and more or less have a realistic basis. If you sort out these jokes that make people mindful, you can find that there are roughly several types of jokes that hurt people. Among the jokes that everyone minds, appearance is mentioned the most, accounting for 45.73%. In addition, joking with favorite idols is not accepted by some people, accounting for more than 27.27%. Making jokes about parents/family, shortcomings/pains, dreams/beliefs, names, and even in a yellow tone, these may be the taboo of the other party. Among the most mentioned jokes about appearance, use fat to tease There are not a few people, “You are so fat and you still eat?” “You are so fat” are all highly praised comments. Boys are tall and okay, shorter ones are said to be “disabled”, and women who grow too tall are ridiculed as “no one wants”. In addition, there are some jokes that are more direct, “Why do you seem to be ugly again”, which is very hurtful. Many points that mind the jokes themselves are probably also something that this person is troubled by. Making jokes about these is undoubtedly poking people’s sore spots, as some netizens said, “Joke about appearance, even if it is an extremely common joke for you, it’s poking my heart word by word.” In student days, classmates There are many people who like to make jokes about being tall, short, fat and thin. These jokes are often said, and they are likely to become an inescapable label on the joker. It’s a joke at first, but it may turn into bullying later on. How many bullying and verbal harassment are pretending to be a joke, but in fact they are just to satisfy their own evil tastes. In China, teasing children is especially popular. I believe that many people have this experience when they were young. There will always be a group of adults who like to say to their children with a smirk, “You see that your parents like your younger brother/sister more”, “Your parents only like your younger brother, no I like you”. Or deliberately say to the child, “You are the child you picked it up”, “You are not your parents’ birth”, if the child cries, he will show a tricky look and comfort him: “I just teased you.” . When you grow up, you will know that these are all jokes, but when you are young, you will really take it seriously and be afraid. Adults find this kind of jokes funny, but children can’t tell the truth from the fake. These indoctrinated jokes that suggest abandonment may become a shadow that they accompany for a long time when they grow up. The speaker may not have the intention, but the listener has the intention. Sometimes you can’t talk nonsense about jokes, especially when you make jokes about the other party, and you must grasp the pain points that the other party has that you can’t touch. Being able to make jokes is not the basic cultivation of a person, but not just making jokes on others. The momentary hiatus is very refreshing, but the person being joked may be really hurt.


By zhiwo

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6 months ago

The university just started, I often go to my girlfriend’s school to find her, and occasionally do not go back to sleep in her dormitory at night. There were two people in our dormitory (not familiar at the time) and they always joked that I was looking for a man. At the beginning, they just joked and laughed, and no one cared. I didn’t know that it became more and more excessive, and I said the same in front of others. The last time I was in the dormitory, the monitor (male) called me something. The people in the dormitory yelled that I was going to find a guy again at night, so I hung up the phone and said very angry and loudly, “Are you guys interesting?” Is it a tantrum? No one speaks, no one makes such jokes since then

6 months ago

I’m the kind of girl who is not tall. When I was in my hometown, I was always called dwarf, dwarf! At that time, I didn’t care about face so much, so I just shouted, and I didn’t feel anything. But after entering junior high school, I don’t know if I have self-esteem. When my childhood partner still called me like this, I blushed with shame. I went to high school later, and my friends from my childhood all studied in different schools. I think I can finally stop being called a dwarf! What I didn’t expect was that some bad male classmates started calling me like this! It doesn’t matter if you tell yourself on the surface, but you can’t get more sad on the inside! Later, when someone called me dwarf like that, I replied, saying as if you are more than two meters tall, who is not one meter! I don’t like people who always make fun of others’ shortcomings. I don’t think they are sensible at all. Saying that I am short is self-deprecating. If it is said by others, I think even if it is a joke, it is not a person worthy of deep friendship! Maybe they think this is just a joke, but I’ve been hurt by this kind of thing since I was a kid, so I would really mind! Tell them directly, I don’t like you making jokes like this! They also said, why are you so stingy, you can’t make a joke! Really, such a person, I don’t know what he thinks! I’m as far away as I can, and I can’t get along with them if I don’t talk speculatively! I told them that I minded and even joked, I’m stingy, what’s wrong!

6 months ago

I was a person who was afraid of the cold since I was a child. I was born in the cold north of the winter. Just thinking about this season, I felt a cold wind hit, and there was an inexplicable fear. Therefore, I don’t like the winter in my hometown, which means I have to wear a heavy padded jacket. In the winter in my hometown, my friends are all wearing thick cotton-padded jackets, and they don’t think there is anything. But it’s different after going out to work. All the beauties on the street regard their thighs as beautiful, and so do colleagues. In this way, I, who was wrapped in a down jacket in winter, became an outlier in the eyes of my colleagues. I think they are abnormal. I think a lot of times, are they not cold? My colleague joked, “You rented your clothes?” At that time, I didn’t realize it yet, and thought to myself: What does it have to do with renting? Later, I remembered that I was really embarrassed when people said I was reluctant to take off my clothes. Of course, these didn’t cause me any real harm. In my impression, there was one thing that really hurt me. I was kissed by a male colleague. This male colleague loves to make jokes about the relationship between men and women. He can think of that aspect of everything at work, full of muddling jokes. However, he is skilled, this is a newly opened department and needs his leadership, so he is highly regarded by the boss. In general, I treat him far away, but the intersection of work makes me have to bite the bullet and cooperate with him. One day, when he was about to leave his job, he might have drunk too much and was kissed coldly. I felt insulted and rushed to the boss’s office to request a department transfer. The boss apologized to me and investigated the surveillance, and finally transferred to the department where I worked before. The next day, he also apologized to me, saying it was a joke, but I didn’t accept it in my heart. However, what embarrassed me is still behind. Later, when I chatted with a colleague, she said, I know about you. Looking at my suspicious eyes, she said about the monitoring. Oh, it suddenly dawned on me that it was her husband who was in charge of monitoring. I felt that chatting was uncomfortable for a moment. Sometimes, it is really necessary to keep work confidential.

6 months ago

Of course, it’s a joke about the body. To be honest, I have always felt that this kind of joke is very low, a bit of body shame. I think girls have heavier body hair, and they are more cheerful in middle school. Some boys and girls will say “your hair is longer than boys” or “you have a beard” (in fact, lip hair). I started to laugh all the time. At first, I would pretend to be calm and awkward to laugh with me, but I found that they would also come out and laugh from time to time. Later I couldn’t help but finally said that I don’t like this kind of joke, but they said, “It’s just a joke.” That’s it, really stingy”. I didn’t stop until I was so angry at a friend that I cried once. It was also because of my young age. I was especially concerned about other people’s “inadvertent” jokes. In addition, I was laughed at when I was getting fat and a certain action was funny. Now this kind of joke can’t hurt me anymore. I’m like me. What do you guys say I don’t care, but I still think it shouldn’t be. Making such physical jokes to others, so I will choose to go back. The most important point is that the person being joked has clearly expressed that he does not like this kind of joke, and that person will continue to make jokes, which is too much.

6 months ago

I remember when I was just promoted to the first grade of elementary school, in the new environment, a group of children had just met. It hasn’t been a week before, I have a nickname “MSG”, because there is a word “Jing” in my name…In current terms, it’s called: It’s not very harmful, but it’s extremely insulting. Strong. This is something I have never experienced before. For the first time, a group of people followed my butt and called nicknames, and I was dumbfounded. I do not know why. Why doesn’t everyone have a nickname, only I have it? Why is everyone yelling “MSG” together, and I am the one called? Am I different from others? Did I act differently from others? At that time, he was young, sad and helpless, and it seemed that he was not accepted by most people. This directly established the tone that I dared not speak in the entire elementary school. After many years, that kind of little thing has long since caused me no harm, and that incident has long been forgotten by me. Until I saw a video, Huo Siyan’s son “Uh-huh” was given the nickname at school, and he said helplessly: My nickname is “belly button”. Then Du Jiang said that his nickname when he was a child was also called this. After laughing, I remembered that I must have been the same as “Uh-huh” at the time, a little bit lonely, a little helpless, and a little envious of children who don’t have a nickname. Are they malicious? maybe not. Just because there is a certain word in the name, there is a little connection in the cognition of a certain group, which is fun. The world of children is so small. If it were not for limited thinking, the person who was given the nickname would not be really sad, right? This is the world of children, and I believe that today’s children will still be nicknamed. I think if when I was young, when I heard people nicknamed me and felt down, someone would say to me: It’s okay, this is the name that people gave you when they noticed you. I think I will be relieved a lot. Now as I grow older, I gradually realize that life is a circle. You feel pain in this circle, maybe it’s time to stand on your toes and look out of the circle. When you climb another circle, the jokes that bothered you are all in the past~~

6 months ago

He does not mean that. Although others think these jokes are not important, to me, they are a knife that hurts my heart. I have been weaker and sicker since I was a child, and I am still the same. Every time the relatives in the family gather together during the Chinese New Year, they joked with me: Why don’t you have a boyfriend yet, so skinny, you can’t find it if you don’t look for it… I’m embarrassed, but I can’t say anything because of them Are the elders. They all think that people like me won’t find a boyfriend, and no one likes my thinness. But when I heard these words, I was really embarrassed and a little angry. With so many relatives, why do I have to hold me? My mother told me that my relatives were just joking and told me not to care. But are the jokes played again and again? Is there nothing else done in life? But I have no choice but to internalize these unhappiness. There are many similar things. Maybe when they said these jokes, they did not consider the impact on me, but were satisfied with the joy and addiction of the moment. But it is these jokes that make me less and less want to be close to them, more and more want to stay away from the life with them. Think about it another way, if you are the subject of a joke, how do you feel? Surely it’s not easy. So, empathy is very important, hope we all have.

6 months ago

When I was in school, my mother always boasted that I was the first in grade, with 100 points in subjects. Actually, I didn’t study so well, and my relatives knew that, so my relatives would tell me “xx study so Okay, I want to go to Peking University or Tsinghua University, hahahaha” At that time, I felt very embarrassed and disgusted. I think I really can’t afford this kind of joke. It’s really uncomfortable. I play well with a certain boy and get closer to him. Some classmates joked “Do you like xxx” or “Do you like xxx”. This is really true to me. irony. Some boys are really stinky, and some girls in the class don’t grow up particularly good-looking, so they shouted to other boys: xxx is your wife, xxx is your girlfriend, I really vomit, this It is trampling on the self-esteem of others. I was thrown a bug at the neckline by the same table in my junior high school. It was summer. I was wearing summer school uniform and the bug fell into the clothes. I was so scared. I was still laughing at the table and imitated my screaming voice. I was really super angry at the time.

6 months ago

To be honest, I am not too fond of joking. Especially with age, the tolerance for jokes has begun to broaden, but the energy of harm to oneself has also begun to infinitely magnify. Especially in the adult world, you cannot lose your temper at will. Perhaps the joke that has hurt me the most in the past few years has come from the people around me. My mother often joked with me: “It’s easy for you to be a mother. When you come back, it’s windy and rainy.” Every time I hear this, my heart feels like a needle pierced. Where is it easy. The husband and wife are both only children, and they are responsible for the birth, old age, sickness and death of four elderly people, the normal operation of the three families, and the growth of the children. They are all grassroots families from the countryside, so how can they dare to stop for a moment. I want to be with my child all the time, knowing all her dynamics, and there will be no wind and rain, but where is the time and energy? Sometimes jokes seem to be a spice of life, but in many cases, they really hurt people invisible. So I don’t make jokes with other people myself. Adults have too many scars in the world, and they are all people hiding in their own “tree holes”, and they want to comfort each other.

6 months ago

Many people have this kind of experience. At the class reunion, at the beginning, everyone looked at each other and was very cautious. But as long as one person starts to make a joke, the atmosphere is immediately different. A joke, it can be said to be a spice in a boring life. When we are at parties and chatting with people, we will inevitably make some jokes to ease the embarrassment and make the serious atmosphere instantly relaxed. However, not everyone likes these jokes, and some casual jokes are really hurtful. The joke you made is hurting me. The joke is a special language phenomenon. It’s hard to say whether jokes are polite or impolite, it’s more between polite and impolite. In other words, it is not easy to make a joke. A proper joke can leave a good impression of humor. But if the joke is overdone, it may feel offensive.

6 months ago

Thanks for the invitation, I haven’t been hurt by jokes. Let’s talk about my own story. I am a female, with a huge chest, and I can see the right sleeve from the left sleeve. When everyone was growing more obviously in junior high school, someone came to make fun of my breasts. But the amazing thing is that I have never felt inferior or angry because of this, because I think I have a huge cock and look great in clothes. Later, the titles given to me in the group are the airport apron or a single word. I basically have nothing. Seriously. Once I talked to my friends about this kind of thing, they were all surprised and said why you weren’t angry. I thought about it, I don’t know. Wow, I’m actually very grumpy, but I simply don’t care about these people being forced to talk about them. Forcing Lai Lai to say that for a long time, I found that I didn’t respond or even didn’t care, and I stopped being boring. Then I went to high school and college. No matter whether my breasts were big or not, I started to envy my small breasts. I didn’t have to wear underwire bras, shirts and oversize clothes. So I felt that I was even worse.

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