I’m always more radical in speaking. Let’s put it this way, breaking up is like dying alone. In my understanding, breaking up means that it is impossible to come together in this lifetime. Except that the other party did not lose her life, we will not have any contact for the rest of our lives, which is equivalent to her death in my world. So how did I treat the dead? When my grandfather died, I shed a few tears because he treated me very well when I was young. When my grandma died, I just knelt on the ground and knocked my head a few times. Because I don’t like my grandma. Maybe this will make me cold-blooded and ruthless, which is not popular in our local terms. However, in my opinion, I am affectionate enough compared to animals and plants. When the plants wither, their seeds will not have a chance to cry. Because this is just a replacement of old and new life. It is also impossible for the antelopes hunted by lions to have their offspring crying for them, because their offspring still need to work hard for tomorrow’s reproduction. Breaking up proves that for some reason we cannot be with each other in our entire life. Then the best thing I should do is to pack up my mood and move towards the future to find my true love. Life is too short, so short that many times you can’t calm down and think carefully and figure out one thing. So why should we be so sad and waste our lives for a vain she who will never reach?
This is me. Every time I finish sending a message to the person I like, I immediately delete the dialog box and chat history. Because I know that if I don’t delete it, I will look over and over again and again day after day, trying to figure out each word. I don’t want to be so humble. Every time the person I like can’t read it back, I tell myself that it’s okay. Adults are very busy and don’t care about the details. Then I regain my morale and find new topics to send to him. I think every new year and holidays, it’s great and there is a reason to send him a message, and I will even start to post something weeks in advance. He can’t read it back. He could not read it the second time. He could not read it back for the nth time. Just yesterday, I used that lively and outgoing and lovely person as before and sent him a very gentle message, and then deleted all my, all, his contact information, including the memo. He knows nothing. Today is the first day of my withdrawal. I picked up my phone and opened the APP again and again. Because I know that although I cannot contact him, he can contact me. It doesn’t matter, I still tell myself that. Because this is just a withdrawal reaction. I know the next challenge is waiting for me, that is, when he finally sends me a message, I open it, read it, and then delete the dialog box. It can’t be read back. I still like him today, yes. But my pride and self-esteem don’t like me anymore. I know I can complete the challenge, my dear subject, just like yours.
I have tried to persist in this kind of love. At an inappropriate period, I secretly fell in love with a boy from the second year of high school. During this period, I have shown goodwill, exchanges, and met. I have not identified the boy and it is not good to refuse to let others feel that he feels good. . In order not to delay my studies, I confessed to him when I graduated from the third year of high school. He explicitly rejected me because we both failed in the college entrance examination. We both chose to repeat the course. I am not reconciled to repeat the course together and enter the university of my choice. My dad felt that I was attracted by the prosperous city because I was studying in the city, so I didn’t go to the same school with him. They chose to repeat the school. During the period, I took the initiative to contact him and asked if I could go to university together. Maybe he was afraid of affecting my study and was vague. He didn’t tell me, but he told me the phone. I confessed again on New Year’s Eve. He didn’t agree. I cried very sad, but later he started to contact me and share with me. His life dynamics, he invited me out to play, I thought we might have a result, but I don’t know who said something to him later, his attitude changed again, and he kept me away. I think this is very tormenting. People are very uncomfortable, and then deleted all his contact information and blocked him. Although it is a bloody story, for me, those three years of youth were beautiful, but more of it was sadness and the impact on schoolwork. Because of him, I have cried too many times, but it is not worth it, because For those who do not love you, tears will only make you cheaper.