After my brother died, we also kept the word from grandma. Grandma asked my brother, we said we went abroad, and it will take a few years to come back. Grandma said that’s okay, that’s okay, really good boy, can go abroad. Later, grandma’s dementia became more and more severe, and she was less and less when she was awake. She seemed to always live in memories, unable to distinguish between the things in front of her. But once she secretly told me: Did my brother pass away? She said that she actually guessed it, how could she go abroad suddenly? After going abroad, no one talks about this person anymore. She said she knew everything, she pretended not to know, deceived us and deceived herself. I threw myself into her arms and cried like I did when I was a child. I was so sad that I missed my brother so much. At that moment, I didn’t want to pretend that it was over and I was not sad anymore. But my grandma got into a state of confusion, wiping my tears hurriedly and asking me: Why are you crying? Did you fail the exam? It’s okay. Our daughter is a girl, so we don’t have to work hard like my brother. It’s hard to study. Let me tell your dad, don’t fight on the daughter. She went back to her memory. When I was a child, I cried when I failed the exam. My brother always ranked first. My father always said that I was not as smart as my brother. At that moment, I didn’t know if she was really unconscious. I would rather she be unconscious.

Uncle’s 50-year-old myocardial infarction suddenly disappeared. At that time, my grandmother was less than 80 years old. All the relatives and neighbors said that they were hiding things from her grandmother. Only I secretly asked my mother why she was hiding? At that time I was in junior high school. My mother said she couldn’t accept it because she was afraid of grandma. I said my grandma is in good health. How can I hide my son who can see each other every week? The hardest part of this is our family who lives with grandma. Once grandma finds out that uncle does not visit her or call, we have to lie every day. Mom said that everyone in the father’s family made this decision, and they had no choice but to cooperate. Mom couldn’t help it. Later, my grandma found out within a few weeks. The reason was that the neighbors chatted about white-haired people sending black-haired people. Grandma was originally surprised to see the black cuffs that fell out when her cousin came to see her. The relatives in my hometown called and asked. After learning about it, I scolded my father fiercely. It probably meant that she was very sad when her son died, and the whole family made her even more angry if she didn’t let her send him off. Grandma was angry for a long time, and I coaxed her every day. Therefore, I personally feel that it is best not to hide this kind of thing. If the old man is confused, it will not affect his emotions too much. Just tell the elderly in a more relaxed state.

zhiwo

By zhiwo

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helpmekim
7 months ago

Sooner or later, you will know that it is impossible to hide it for a lifetime. Instead of regretting not seeing the last time, it is better to be painful and relieved. Talk about my grandma. She is the “brave model” in my fourth grade. My uncle will go there in the morning. Picking up coal on the national highway. At that time, it was still dark. The driver might be fatigued. In short, he accidentally ran into his uncle. He died on the spot. Later in my first year of junior high, my dad died of stomach cancer. After suffering painful torture, my grandma passed away. I have four daughters and three sons, but two sons. My dad was mentally prepared because he was ill. It’s okay. But my uncle, it was really an accident. I talked and laughed with my grandma the day before. After a dozen or so hours, we were separated from each other forever. But my grandma has never been concealed, and she naturally knew after the incident happened. When I went to see your uncle, my grandma told me, take a good look at your uncle, and you will never see him again, and you may not see him in the next life. Then I stared at the uncle’s grinning splayed feet, and now those feet are still vivid every time I think of it. I still remember my grandmother holding the uncle’s hand and saying “X, why are you walking like this? Suddenly, I won’t be able to eat what my mom made for you.” After crying and wiping tears, my grandma’s life went as usual. She should eat and drink, and she lived to be more than 80 years old. What do I want to say? Birth, old age, sickness and death are uncontrollable, pain must be painful, but long-term consideration, don’t hide it, the last aspect is an explanation of the family’s affection in this life

heloword
7 months ago

Grandma’s neighbors and old couple lost their daughter. That lady is a well-known literary and art worker who is both German and Yixin. The old man’s junior colluded with his relatives and friends: “The country sent her to make a movie abroad.” The old lady never believed it. When an acquaintance of the same generation comforted her and said, “I heard that your daughter is making movies abroad,” she answered calmly. In fact, it’s gone. My family lied to me.” But the old lady told her acquaintances that the old man had a bad heart, so don’t let him know about this. The old man did show that he believed his daughter to go abroad in front of everyone. When the old man was dying, his family comforted him, saying, “Your daughter will return to China to watch you after making the movie.” The old man soberly stated: “What movie can be shot for more than ten years? She has long been gone.”

helpyme
7 months ago

I have a high school classmate who happened to be drowned the day before 9/11, less than a month before he was ready to go to work… At that time, his grandparents were over 80 years old, and they were not in good health, so they could only hide as much as possible. , His room at home has been kept as it is, and then said that he has found a job in another place, and the work is too busy to go home often. Then he said that he was going to take a postgraduate entrance examination and did not have time to go home, and finally said that he was studying abroad… It will also create the illusion that he hurried home and leave, leaving some gifts for the elderly. Although the elderly was a little skeptical at first, as he got older, his health became worse and worse, and he did not have the energy to study deeply. , I even dare not say, but watching them adopt a child, I think the old man should also understand a little bit… Two years ago, before the classmate’s grandfather passed away, the family asked him who else he would like to see. He replied “No, I am going to see my grandson…”

sina156
7 months ago

My grandma is still there, and her daughter-in-law passed away more than five years ago. The mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have been stumbling for more than 40 years, but overall they are still passing. I clearly remember the last time my aunt was discharged from the hospital. But it was still supported to take a look at my grandma’s bed at my house (my grandma has been paralyzed for several years). Weeping away. Then my grandma burst into tears. My aunt passed away in a few days.

yahoo898
7 months ago

A few months ago, the uncle suddenly stopped working. After several younger brothers and sisters had discussed with the next generation, they were still not ready to be full of grandma. Grandma was 89 years ago. Grandpa passed away more than ten years ago. My mother passed away two years later. Now the eldest son is not working. The ambulance drove back from Hangzhou. He was holding oxygen and was unable to breathe at home. She tricked her to let her go. The uncle below is working in the workshop, saying that it is urgent. The adults in the family are busy tidying up the room and making the bed (the other is downstairs, the room on the upper floor has a bed, but it is not a long-term stay, this is the country, usually live in the town). Two oxygen cylinders are prepared, one is for grandma, and the medicine is ready. He also prepared a bed for grandma downstairs at the uncle’s house next door, so that grandma could not sleep in the original room (close to the bed where the uncle was going to sleep). At four or five o’clock in the afternoon, grandma was preparing to cook and saw someone in the house when she left the factory. She asked why you guys came, ah, then I’m going to cook. You are eating here, and you see the bed again. Why are you asking why this bed? It is said that the uncle is back and can’t go upstairs, so I can sleep here. Then again, you can sleep in my room, and where do you sleep when you sleep in your room? Shop it quickly. The grandma, who was on crutches, moved up the stairs and sat down diagonally across the bed. She began to daze and read a few words in a low voice. When she thought about it, she had a bad plan. At 8 o’clock, I said that the ambulance was in place while I was eating. When I passed by, I saw that my granddaughter was sitting around my grandmother, and my grandmother kept wiping tears. More people are busy living around the bed, and the girl’s “grandfather” call keeps ringing in my ears. Occasionally there are “dad” and “elder brother”. . . Waiting for the last piece of sorrow, grandma also burst into tears, the children crying while helping grandma to wipe her tears, a few elders immediately came over and helped grandma to sit in the next room, and told us to take care of it, and the door was taken , The next door is busy. During the few days at home, people kept coming to visit, and people kept coming to let grandma take care of her. Every time she kept tearing. I kept crying when I was alone. Fortunately, there are many granddaughters and granddaughters. The youngest one and a half years old is already a lot of coaxing. Grandma sees the children and does not want to cry in front of the children. Slowly, things are done. Slowly, the emotions disappear a little bit. Slowly, there are more chores in life to be busy. Slowly, life returns to peace, only occasionally when grandma mentions it. “devil”. This year, my grandma is 90, and my eyes are much stronger than when I didn’t wear glasses. It’s okay if the ears are deaf. Talking to her should be like shouting, thinking very clearly, what to say and what not to say, very clear. It’s just that the legs are already very bad, I can’t walk 300 meters, I can’t leave the body

leexin
7 months ago

Grandma was ill. The doctor said that the old days are scarce. I’m afraid it won’t work. Uncles also met and started tossing grandma’s things. Mother flushed anxiously and drove a group of people out of our house. She stayed on the bedside and whispered to her grandma. Then, I asked my brother and I to guard by the bed. She went out to get the medicated meal for grandma to eat. For half a year, my mother cleaned up and took care of her grandma. Even if other people came empty-handed, there were very few others. She shook her head when she came. I left without speaking. That year happened to be the earthquake in 2008. My aunt said that on the day of the earthquake, a large group of them were talking under our unfinished building. At first, everyone thought it was because my house was not repaired. Everyone was running away, far away from our house, but my mother turned around and ran upstairs to hug grandma. When a group of people saw my mother who was usually joking and cynical, the moment my grandma came out, everyone said that she was ashamed as a hero. My grandma knew it, but she complained about my mother, and said repeatedly, in the future, stop it, a handful of old bones…

greatword
7 months ago

They always know. Tell me about my grandma, she is really strong. My grandma has 8 children and two daughters and six children. Wu Jiu died because of drinking. He drank all day long. One day he drank and fell on the side of the road. He pulled back and lay on the bed. My grandmother had been serving for more than a month. I often talked about the fifth uncle, never cried, and dropped his head as he said, not speaking. On the last birthday before my fifth uncle died, I didn’t know where I got the money. I bought a chicken and sent it to my third uncle’s house to stew it. We asked him why he bought chicken. He said, “Today is my birthday. I know if I can live until my birthday next year.” As a result, he said nothing. In the following year, my third uncle drank and died at home because of cerebral hemorrhage. My mother came back to her mother’s house on the 16th day of the first lunar month. The two of them ate pancakes. After they finished baking the cakes, someone came to call my mother and told my mother that my third uncle died at home. It was her daughter who called and no one answered and made people jump into the wall. watch. My mother went there and didn’t have a meal. When she came back, she let my grandma eat dinner before telling my grandma, “My third brother is gone.” My grandma cried at the time. Later, I didn’t see how she talked about it. I remember the death day of my son very clearly. My fourth uncle drank alcohol and was hospitalized with cerebellar hemorrhage. She only let her know after being discharged from the hospital, so she scolded everyone for not letting her know, and she would not see her if her son died. My mother was beaten because of a dispute and was hospitalized for more than ten days. She didn’t go to my grandma’s house for more than a month. Before, my grandma was going to visit my house. Later, I couldn’t keep it from my mother, so I went back to my mother’s house and told my mother what happened. My grandma cried and felt sorry for my mother. She said that he should be asked to go to the troublemaker’s house to sit and talk. Anyway, she is getting older. Get beaten when beaten. The above is what happened to my grandma before 84. After 85, her physical condition went from bad to worse, and she almost went away at 86. In the same year, my sixth uncle was suffering from cerebral hemorrhage and hemiplegia due to drinking. So when my sixth uncle was getting better, I told him that my grandmother was going to see it. It was very uncomfortable. He cursed us for not letting him know early, and what if we don’t see our son. Then my sixth uncle saw my grandma, and my grandma cried. So you see, you can’t hide it, they can always know. For us, we don’t want the elderly to be hit, but the news that we conceal may be the regret that the elderly cannot forgive for the rest of their lives. My grandma went there this year. When I wrote this answer, my grandma’s forbearance and strong attitude is still playing back in my mind, and I will learn from her.

loveyou
7 months ago

It’s sad to see such a problem. It is really painful for a white-haired person to send a black-haired person. If the elderly are already very old and they are expected to be unable to survive the news, then don’t tell them. You can make up a reason. For example, if you go to a long distance to do business, you can say that you have gone to some Africa, China. In the underdeveloped areas of Asia, there is no way to get in touch, so that the elderly do not worry more, and then they can forge some letters or something. If the elderly is not very old, and there is at least a life expectancy of more than ten years in the future, then you must prepare in advance, and you can tell her according to the above that the child has gone to a place far and far away for business Or do you go to work, and then talk about getting sick, until there is no cure, turning this matter into a gradual process. In normal times, you can also tell the elderly how their children are, and make up some similar stories to prepare the elderly in advance. There is another method, which may not be approved by many people, but it is really easy to use. I hope that it will not be reported after it is written. That is to find a sustenance for the elderly, that is, some beliefs. This happened in my family. My uncle passed away because of an accident. At that time, my grandfather survived by relying on his belief in Buddhism. Buddhism has a set of causal theory that can help the elderly to unravel. Of course I want to emphasize that if you use this method, you must use a serious and legal method, and you must not use crooked ways. Finally, I hope that the old man who asked me can enjoy his old age.

strongman
7 months ago

How could one’s own children not know! When my grandpa passed away in 2010, he was 70 years old. After passing away, the whole family went back to visit the grandpa (grandpa’s mother). The old woman was 90 years old and she was very capable. She was wearing a cheongsam with a small parasol. At the beginning, we asked the eldest about her situation. We all lied to her, but she couldn’t walk. Then she secretly pulled her uncle into the room at night and said, “Is your father gone? Don’t lie to me, don’t I know my own child?”

stockin
7 months ago

Unless the old man is isolated from the world, he will always know. My mother passed away in 55 and my grandfather was more than 80. The family also kept the secret from him. At that time, the old man had flexible legs and feet. He wandered outside and sat on the pier every day. Chatting, something happened in the town and it spread immediately, and my mother was known to many people, and naturally the old man would understand it, and I kept blaming us for not saying it later. After another year, Uncle Qi was also paralyzed and passed away for many years. The same concealed it. Later, it was too angry. My child would know from others when he left. Later, my uncle didn’t dare to hide it when he was in his forties. I was fourteen at the time, and I accompanied him when he was about to be cremated. He watched him walk out of the small room and held the door with his eyes clouded. The stupid mouth can only persuade him to go back. The old man just stays at the door. The white-haired person sends the black-haired person. What’s more, this kind of 80-odd old man will think that he will let my child go if he doesn’t go. In a few months, grandpa It doesn’t work. Suddenly I felt that there were many people left at home in those few years. The eldest uncle was still there at that time. I think my mother, Uncle Seventh and Uncle, are both in poor health. No one will pass away in the future, but I really can’t think of it. I came to see me from Fuzhou the day before, and I suffered a sudden heart attack in the next two days. No matter who died, it is rare for us to be juniors, and it will be a lifetime shadow.

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