April 11, Xinyu, Jiangxi. Mr. Huang reported that the 11-year-old son suspected that he did not finish his homework during the winter vacation. He jumped from home on the day of school (February 27) and died 9 days after the rescue.

The poor boy was only 11 years old. He left the world and gave himself the last signature: “Incurable” child. It is evident how depressed and painful the child is. To be honest, after listening to the child’s father’s remarks and “proving evidence” in the title video, I have already felt the child’s suffering of “kicking the ball” that was tormented day and night. What kind of parents can actually associate their children with suicide directly with “the teacher left too much homework”? Take a look at the WeChat conversations that gave evidence. Just before the boy’s accident, this winter vacation, the school teacher said, “Every time I posted the homework in the group, there was no trace of correction” and asked if there was any adult counseling and supervision, but the boy’s father only said: “We Haven’t gone back yet”. ——Why don’t you help your son communicate with the teacher well at this time, talk about the progress of the child’s homework, difficulties, and where to help? Is it because the day-to-day is simply let go, so the progress and details are not known at all? The boy stayed up until two or three o’clock and couldn’t finish his homework. “Writing and crying”-what was his father doing at this time? Do you have the patience to explain to your children? Did you let the child rest well, and then accompany the child to discuss with the teacher to adjust the amount and difficulty of the homework? The father also accused the teacher of grouping 11 children with poor academic performance alone and leaving homework alone: ​​—— Isn’t this because the teacher saw that several children could not keep up with the progress, and that the effect of ordinary homework was not good because of concern and concern. Only then did they assign homework to these children individually. How much do I hope they can check the missing and fill up the vacancies and catch up? The boy’s father said that before the accident, the boy himself said that the winter vacation homework had been done, but after the accident, he looked through his schoolbag. There was a large winter vacation homework and weekly book in it, which were not finished. —— What really needs to be reflected on is why the boy would rather give up his entire life than dare, unwilling, or unable to tell his plight and his father to his family? Father should have been the guardian of his life, the last harbor in the storm in his heart! Therefore, every time they hear that a child commits suicide, what parents say most often is inexplicably consistent: usually a very cheerful child! Cheerful! When the child has positioned himself as “incurable”, when he is unable to grasp even a trace of straw in his heart, when he has realized that he is too depressed, and has used his suicide note to plan the last glimpse of this life ——His father was still wondering if this bloody letter was a third-party fraud, and he was surprised at why the originally “very cheerful” child couldn’t think about it. In the video, the principal’s answer was really heart-stirring: throughout the summer vacation, (boy father) didn’t care about children or left-behind children. Children played with mobile phones from morning to night, and he didn’t stop him. This is entirely caused by family problems, not the school. The most ridiculous thing is that at the end of the video, my father actually demanded compensation. He hoped: “First, let the school pay attention to it, and second, give me some compensation, 100,000 to 200,000 yuan, right?” Let the school take it seriously? Give him “mental compensation” for his negligent father? ——Who will compensate for the child’s spirit and his lonely and depressed heart? I often think that every life comes to the world with the tenacity and heat inherently engraved in genes. “To live” actually does not need additional meaning. When I hugged my baby for the first time, he was so weak that I could hardly hold it, fearing that a little bit of strength would hurt his delicate body. But the moment the doctor put the baby on my chest, he stopped crying and looked at me in detail, using his tiny fingers to hold one of my fingers tightly, as if his whole life You can completely rely on this chest and this warm finger. Why, as parents, we have to alienate our children in the future, abandon him to the mobile phone screen, and let him struggle alone in the sea of ​​academic problems and slowly suffocate? As long as there is more communication, more tolerance, and more love in the company, no one, no child, will easily give up the warm memory of birth and the ardent expectation of life. The boy wrote in his suicide note, “I don’t know if anyone will read it.” I hope you can know in that world that your letter has been discovered and read by people. And some people are heartbroken for your young and dying life, sorry for the life you should have enjoyed.

zhiwo

By zhiwo

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helpmekim
7 months ago

In the past few years, I have seen news about children’s suicide on Zhihu. There are far more suicides due to parents’ reasons than teachers’ suicide. The student who was slapped by the parent after being called by the teacher was the same as the child who jumped off the Yangpu Bridge. It’s the same with this child today. why? Because the parent should be the person closest to the child, the person that the child should trust most. Even if you encounter an unqualified teacher, a qualified parent can find ways to help the child transfer schools, transfer classes, and change teachers. And if the parent is unqualified, the child can only reincarnate and change by himself. Is this really due to a lot of homework? When I was young, I did so much work that I could not finish writing. My mother and my brother wrote for me, but I never thought about committing suicide. What’s more, it’s not that there are too many homework in a day, and the time is too short to finish it. This is a winter vacation homework. The kids play with mobile phones and no one cares about it at home, so it is inevitable that they can’t finish it. This dad himself said in the interview that he asked him if he had finished his work before school started, and he said that he was only close to finishing the rest of the weekly diary. After the accident, I will look at his schoolbag. There is also a winter vacation homework, and more than one has not been finished. Probably such a parent, if the child is in no trouble, he will not go to see how much the child has done with his homework. The responsibility of educating children should not only lie in school. Schools can teach children knowledge, but children’s character, habits, and self-management are part of the family education that cannot be ignored. Parents are the first teachers of their children, and they are also teachers who will influence their children’s life. Please remember your responsibility as a teacher who cannot be changed at will.

heloword
7 months ago

After reading the tears, the inscription is a child who is “incurable”. Whose comment is this sentence? “If I die, I hope someone will continue to play my games, on my mobile phone.” This is really the nature of a child who loves to play. It is the sisters and his own games that I can’t forget. The 11-year-old boy jumped off the building without finishing his homework and died! The suicide note is heartbreaking! Heathcliff’s video 2280 plays Now the father of the child means that the teacher assigns too much homework, and the child fails to play and gives 11 extra homework to the poor students. The school principal said that the child is like a “left-behind child” throughout the summer vacation. It is the responsibility of the parents to play mobile phones and not manage them at ordinary times, resulting in failure to complete the homework afterwards. A tragedy caused by a homework? Or is it caused by the lack of warmth in the family? Failure to finish homework is the last straw that crushes the child, but suicide is never overnight. The father of the child said, “First, let the school take it seriously, and second, give me some compensation, 100,000-200,000.” The principal said that he had organized donation activities, all of which were voluntary. The teacher’s donations were hundreds of hundreds, and that’s it. , It seems that we are not talking about the suicide of the child anymore, and are all concerned about money. I’m depreesed! The child’s suicide note is full of deep helplessness. No one can rely on it at a young age. If you are “depressed” at such a young age, it is certain that the parents are negligent.

helpyme
7 months ago

Say a digression. When I first saw this news, I didn’t remember whether it was Weibo or the Toutiao pop-up window. At that time, someone commented below. It probably means that this kid who loves to play games is ruined by games. He is a problem teenager. Don’t give it to the school and parents. The other details are estimated to have been said by everyone. I saw that Zhihu this question suddenly remembered that comment, and wanted to talk late at night. Why do I see this sentence so sensitive? Because my adolescence is also the “Internet addiction girl” in the eyes of my parents. In order to chat and play games online, you must go to an Internet cafe even if you know that you will be beaten. After I bought a computer at home, my dad locked the study and even asked uncle to pry open the door of his study to go online. Why is it so crazy? 80% of parents think it’s because I’m not obedient. About 20% feel that the Internet has ruined me. But I didn’t understand it at the time, and it took more than ten years to realize that the urgent name is loneliness. At that time, I couldn’t find a sense of presence elsewhere. Poor grades, average popularity, high mental pressure, and depressed life. Game leveling can make me not feel that I have failed, and online chat will make me not feel lonely. Will an 11-year-old single boy be lonely? Will do. I felt lonely when I was three years old. When I was abandoned by other children because I loved to cry, I often squatted in a daze in the sand at the door of my house. I didn’t know the name of the spreading sadness. I only knew it was loneliness when I grew up. Substituting it in, I will guess. When a child is not understood by others, the inferiority of a single-parent family is “different” from others, and the left-behind children’s desire for parental affection, either will push him to the Internet and games even more. Games are drugs for lonely and helpless people. Many adults have troubles in life and fail in their careers, and they will be addicted to games, not to mention underage children. So don’t define him just because he likes to play games, let alone think that this kid is completely ruined because he says in his suicide note that people keep playing his game account. One person, the most uneasy before death is actually the game account. Isn’t it sad? Maybe he only has friends and warmth in the game, so he can forget his bad situation. Some people don’t like to play games, they are just avoiding tragedy in life.

sina156
7 months ago

I feel that this father is hopeless. Why listen to his tone, which is full of complaints and throwing the pot to others, without blaming himself at all? Even… I can’t hear a little sadness? Is my ear blind? Normal parents are gone, although the child did not say to cry, but at least the emotion in the voice is there. But why can’t I feel my father’s grief in this interview? I didn’t mention the pain, I didn’t feel it at all. Sad, reluctantly. And his grief needs monetary compensation. One more thing about winter homework. It is clear that the parents did not help their children to do time management together. Perhaps this dad doesn’t care about time management at all, and he doesn’t know how to use and allocate time. I don’t know how to educate children, even the minimum companionship is impossible. I only know that he is swiping his mobile phone. The homework is the child’s own business, so he can do it himself! Talking about it is completely a way of throwing hands off the shopkeeper. If it’s just because you can’t finish the homework, then the parents can help you write. No matter how it will not drive the child to a dead end. And, don’t leave anything to the school. (There are so many things like this now, and we blame the outside world for no use) Everyone knows how stressful a child’s homework is. The rules are dead, but people live. If you can’t finish writing, you can take the initiative to communicate with the teacher and say hello in advance! Moreover, I am not against parents to help with homework, especially those meaningless and time-consuming training. Parents who have the ability to discern at critical moments need to help their children do the screening. Homework is just a fuse. The most important thing is the lack of children’s family education, lack of love and companionship. Teachers can’t make up for this part of family education, and schools can’t make up for it. The society can’t bear it either. You can only rely on yourself. Encourage everyone~

yahoo898
7 months ago

Have you noticed a detail? The child is single, and his father works in Zhejiang. He rushed to his home in Jiangxi when he heard the child jumped off the building. The most difficult thing for a single-parent child is that he has already lost a close relative, a companion and guide on his growth path. At this time, he needs the care and care of the one who remains. But what did this father do? The teacher repeatedly reminded the father on WeChat that his child did not complete the homework and did not hand in the homework on time, but the father responded in a perfunctory manner every time, except for a few texts that were just a few seconds of voice. I don’t know what the content of the voice is, but just from the length of the voice, it can be seen that the father does not pay much attention to the child and has not responded positively to the homework. Since there is no ability to take the child well, why should he be brought into this world? I was really sad after reading the child’s “blood book”. He said that the pressure was too great and he couldn’t hold it, so he chose to jump off the building. The signature in the lower right corner is actually “Incorrigible Child”. In the text, I felt lonely and cold in a child’s world. I guess this father usually doesn’t care about the children, nor does he communicate too much with the children. Otherwise, the teacher will not send WeChat to the children’s father many times about the children’s homework and let him supervise the children’s homework. But now the father does not reflect on himself, but instead blames the teacher for the heavy homework, and demands humanitarian compensation from the school. It is understood that a total of 11 students and teachers, including this child, assigned extra homework. Here I really want to ask this father: Why is your child in such a situation, and other children are safe and sound? Is it mixed with your lack of care for your children and your lack of follow-up to your children’s education? This really can’t blame the teacher. Now I have to reduce the burden on my children one by one. As a teacher, who does not want to do less than before with the same salary as before? But in the end, the child’s grades were poor, and the exam was poor, and then I came back to blame the teacher for not teaching his child well. The teacher’s behavior is already very selfless. No parents’ money, free extracurricular tutoring for the children, and let 11 children with poor grades finish their homework, take pictures, upload the corrections, and then send the children to make corrections. I sincerely advised the father to reflect on how he treated his children in the past, and don’t put the responsibility on the school teacher when something goes wrong.

leexin
7 months ago

You think the child jumped off the building without finishing his homework. The vast majority of parents prefer wishful thinking that their children are pretending, making fuss, rebellious, or even shirking responsibility when something goes wrong. I don’t want to admit that my child has depression. Because once they admit that their child is really sick, they are admitting that their education has failed. In recent years, there have been endless news about children jumping off buildings, and it is not helpful for the family and the parties to hold accountable afterwards. How to do? Can such things happen again? I have a friend who is the mother of a seven-year-old child. After the child had just become depressed, she felt that it was the child who was doing it. However, she had to pay attention to the many excessive behaviors of the subsequent child. At the beginning, the effect of taking the child to the treatment was not great. Later, she found me and I taught her a series of methods. The child is much better now. Looking back on the past, she told me: “A lot of times I look at my child and I feel deeply self-blaming. What did I do to push an angel into the abyss.” “I love my child twistedly and cannot accept the child’s inferiority. It should be a complete person, not a machine for learning and answering questions. In the past, every day I was rigorously planning every corner of the child.” “Now I work hard to make changes, and I have no right to deprive myself of what I have belonged to. For his life, I can’t plan his blueprint, even if it’s nothing but happiness, the requirements for the child are lower, he is just a lovely child, and what he needs more is unconditional love and tolerance. “Actually, did you know that depression in children is not terrible. I had this disease when I was young.” The key is that parents need to be soberly aware of why their children get depression, and find out the reasons to find a solution to the symptoms. The so-called “bell-relief” must be tied to the bell. There are two main reasons for the most serious depression in children: The first reason is the interference of parents. The more parents interfere with their children, humans are no longer humans, and humans are like pets. Ordinary pets eat, drink, and sleep. Right, you will find many raised children, the same. This is because he has been interfered for a long time, which can easily lead to depression. The second reason is that parents slap children’s confidence. Even if the child’s confidence is constantly undermined, he will also be prone to depression. As long as the parents have the above two types of behaviors, the child is prone to depression. What should I do if the child is already depressed? It depends on how old the child is. If the child is under 16 years old, the parental change will help the child. Over 16 years old, parents should do more good deeds to accumulate merit for their children. After some children get depression, they will end their lives to get relief. These children are actually very pitiful. His mind will be filled with many delusions, causing him to have no way to eat, no way to rest normally, especially no way to sleep, and then no way to think normally. At this time, when his mind was already invaded by delusion, he couldn’t open the door, even if he stood in front of the door, he didn’t know how to open it. This will have a very serious impact on his life, so in general, parents over the age of sixteen don’t have much help except to accumulate more blessings. What else can parents do if the child is 16 years old? 1. Parents should create a warm family atmosphere. 2. Stop interfering with the child, and try to let the child decide on his own. 3. Allow the child to make mistakes and accept the bad one. 4. Parents let go of their obsessions and help the child become the person she wants to be. For example, the “stock god” Buffett, his special place is his heart. In addition to helping him make a lot of money, Buffett very much hopes that his son will become a financier. His son finally chooses to become a musician. Buffett also accepted and let him pursue his dream. So parents let go of their obsessions, it is a great blessing for their children. In addition, a book I wrote, “Get Happiness”, is a book about how to get happiness that I have practiced and summarized in the past 8 years. It points to the key, clears the fog of phenomena in life, and gives you a handful of how you can master happiness. The key to initiative. It can also help you re-raise your own mental power and the mental power of your child.

greatword
7 months ago

As a platform that allows rational discussion, I don’t think there should be only one person. It’s a pity that both this 11-year-old boy or the suicide news of similar children before. Almost every answer acquiesces to the premise that the decision of the child to commit suicide is reasonable and is inevitably caused under the influence of certain factors. absurd. As long as a child chooses to commit suicide, he must be killed by parents who do not understand education, by teachers who do not respect the children, and by naughty bullies. Why can’t you admit that this is an extreme and irrational choice, this is a scenario with complete leeway, this is a human tragedy in which a single factor and object should not bear full responsibility? This is the case every time, by blindly accusing the wrong party, let the public think that as long as you do nothing, as long as you make any mistake, the child will definitely die. Isn’t it scary? Isn’t it outrageous? This society is now so extreme, either one or the other is black or white, trying to resolve all social contradictions by letting some objects take full responsibility—solving problems by [killing the questioner]. Pointing at the current malpractice and talking about it, I’m fucking wondering, do everyone have no childhood or are they born prematurely? Who hasn’t encountered any problems like this when he was young, who has no conflicts in his family, and who has no painful memories of campus life? I am not saying that children who choose to commit suicide are weak and not strong enough. But the current social atmosphere is like this. Everyone is walking a tightrope and forcing children to walk a tightrope, because the world that children can see is like this. What did they see? The teacher left too much homework to abuse me-I can only be relieved by death. My parents are not accompanied, and I feel the lack of family warmth-I can only be relieved by death. My parents want me to be good, and I am under a lot of pressure-I can only be relieved by death. My parents let me learn my skills, and I don’t have enough time to play-I can only be relieved by death. ……Is it not? I know that the content I wrote will definitely be sprayed, but I am not afraid, because I have a conscience, I don’t want this kind of thing to happen again in my heart. But I know how great the pressure of society, family, and education are, and how many problems are now. The problem of development needs to be solved by development, not to pave the way for children’s blood. I hope those parents who see here can understand: You can not understand educational skills, you can not have so much time to accompany, you can hope that your children are good, and urge your children to learn and progress. But as a parent, you have to do at least one thing-tell your children that there are many ways to solve problems and many ways to vent your emotions. There is no point in choosing to die. As long as you live, you have room for maneuver. I hope those children who see this can understand: I know you have a lot of pressure and even pain, but solving problems is never achieved by eliminating the people who caused them. You can’t solve the person who caused you pain, can you solve yourself. Learn to be patient, learn to face difficulties, hold on and stand tall, remember your own current experience, and apply the strength of these experiences to your future study and life, and teach your children in the future. I hope those who see here and are ready to scold me at me will understand: The current family and education problems are development problems, and solving problems requires a process. The most important thing is to protect every child in this process, instead of using the child’s life to repeatedly emphasize the seriousness of the problem, or even forcing a causal link between the two. Give children more options, give parents more opportunities to adapt to the new era of life education mode, and help solve problems instead of screaming and leaving.

loveyou
7 months ago

After reading it, I was very scared. I think I must tell my child when she starts school that homework or something is just a means of learning knowledge, not an end in itself. Even learning knowledge is a means for a better life, not an end in itself. There are high and low talents, as long as you try your best to live up to yourself. The purpose itself is to let her grow up healthy and happy. In the future, I can make a living on my own, choose what I like to do, and live the life I want. However, the teacher has the teacher’s teaching ideas, and the school has the school’s ideas and difficulties. But if you really can’t finish your homework, it’s not a big deal. There is too much homework, I can do it for her. If you have any difficulties or ideas, you can tell me and communicate with me. If you can’t solve it by yourself, you must ask me for help. I will do my best to help her. The coal industry often has accident warning education activities. In a place where a personal fatal accident occurs, the first is the cessation of production and rectification in the coal mine. The higher-level unit reports the accident, and the industry management department calls on all practitioners to learn, learn from, and formulate preventive and pre-control measures. On the other hand, the current problems in the education industry are usually caused by families and schools. Parents want compensation, but the school says it’s not my business. As for what happened to the kid who committed suicide. How to avoid similar incidents from happening again. What kind of responsibilities do families and schools have, what lessons parents and schools should learn from them, and what preventive measures can be taken, these are rarely seen. There are actually quite a few suicides when children are in school recently because of educational problems (family, school), academic problems, interpersonal problems, love problems, and school violence problems. What makes the child bear so much pressure, and then produce desperate emotions, thoughts of suicide. In addition to the school and the parents in question, it is worthwhile to form a special topic for research. And there should be some shaped results applied to family and school education. In addition, psychological counseling to enter the community, enter the campus, and stay on the campus is an urgent task. Homework has existed for so many years, how reasonable is it? Is it a good educational tool? What is the purpose of writing certain assignments? What is the purpose of learning certain knowledge? I think this is an issue worthy of deep consideration and attention. Children nowadays come into contact with all kinds of information relatively early, and their cognition and understanding of the world is not comparable to when we were young. There are fewer and fewer children who obey, but I think this is a good thing. They formed their own ideas and opinions very early, so it is normal for them to instill some knowledge that we don’t know why we need to learn and why we need to complete the homework. How to in-depth reforms in the education industry is still a very important issue. The quality education promoted in the past few years has only further increased the burden on children and compressed their own entertainment time. How to find a balance between happiness and ability knowledge, I think all parents and education practitioners need to reflect and discuss.

strongman
7 months ago

Is it really because I didn’t finish my homework and ended my life like this? My first reaction after watching this incident was sad and incredible. At the age of 11, mischievous and playful things are common. What happened to a child so small that he left a blood book, claiming that he was a “incurable” child, and ended this short life hastily? From the narration of the boy’s father, we can see that the boy’s grades were poor and the teacher left him with overwork. The boy often did his homework until two or three o’clock in the morning. The father attributed part of the cause of the child’s suicide to the responsibility of the teacher’s school. However, when such a small child does his homework until so late, when the teacher reports the situation to the parents, when the child has psychological problems, what are the parents doing? It is speculated that the boy lacked correct guidance and care since he was a child, sensitive personality, long-term academic pressure, and verbal violence from teachers and parents, which caused a heavy sense of inferiority and powerlessness. In the end, he could not bear it. “Too many jobs”. This gentleman should also reflect on himself. Obviously it is a tragedy that can be avoided, but because of the negligence and neglect of the parents, the school adopts simple and crude methods to improve grades, causing the loss of life. Finally, in the suicide note, the boy mentioned that he hoped that the remaining children would not be like him. The deceased has passed away, and I hope that those who are alive can learn a lesson from this incident. Hope there are games he likes in heaven…

stockin
7 months ago

I am 23, two years after graduating from university, and I often want to jump off the building. I haven’t done my homework for two years, but the social pressure is no less than the pressure in school. I often think it would be great if I could return to university if I had time. Every time I see a country’s voice in the international arena to combat corruption, sanctions and monopolies, it often feels that the country is getting stronger and stronger. But as long as you bring your perspective back to reality, you will find that the involution is very serious, the wages are low, the housing prices are high, and you are afraid to fall in love. Try not to think about marriage, wedding gifts, houses, cars, children’s education, and aging. The environment is really hard work. I’m just an ordinary person and I can’t make any outstanding contributions to the country. Maybe jumping off the building is really the best solution. But when I want to make up my mind to jump off the building, I will think that I am the only child in the family, am I too selfish when I die.

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